Feedback Unit 4

Hi Kaela and Heaven,

I think you did a really nice job providing concise information on ADHD and the overview of pharmaceutical advantages/disadvantages to its use in young girls.  As someone who has a strong prevalence of ADD/ADHD diagnosis in my family tree, myself include, I find this topic truly fascinating. Particularly, as a female identified as having ADHD not until my late adolescent period, it makes me curious as to whether or not the statistics are missing a vital piece of information, maybe girls learn to adapt and self regulate better than their male counterparts earlier in life?  I’m curious if you found any longitudinal studies on the efficacy/impact on neuro-development or hormonal function when the developing brain is provided with amphetamines or methylphenidates such as Ritalin, Adderall, or Concerta?  This is particularly curious when considering how different the pharmacokinetics is in the female body.  

I watched my brother really struggle during this age range and time period when he was called down to the school office daily to take his prescribed dosage of Ritalin.  It was incredibly distressing for him, and he frequently verbalized that he was “stupid” and that he shouldn’t bother trying because school was just “harder” for him.  Beyond the neurological impact to the developing brain, I cant help but speculate that there are likely long-term emotional impacts associated with these kids having to regulate something that comes so much easier to others. 

Some grammatical corrects/suggestions for your segments that came up when I pasted your content into Grammarly.com: 

Common Condition

·     Your citation for (Walls, et al., 2018; Emilsson, et al., 2017) should not have a comma after the last name, rather it should read (Walls et al., 2018; Emilsson et al., 2017).

·     In the sentence “There may or may not be associated motor deficits…”, consider re-wording to something like: “There may potentially be motor skill deficits associated with [the diagnosis] as well”… 

·     Remove the comma after Kaiser in your (Kaiser, et al., 2015) citation 

·     Remove comma after name in (Shahidullah, et al., 2018).

·     Remove comma after name in (Emilsson, et al., 2017).

·     Remove comma after name in (Christiansen, et al., 2015).

·     In the following sentence, I am confused regarding symptoms of what “Girls also may exhibit more severe symptoms than male children”… symptoms of ADHD, or symptoms of feeling emotional or like a failure? 

Conventional Treatment

·     Remove comma after name in all citations (Walls, et al., 2018).

Advantages for Practitioners

·     Second paragraph, sentence reading “Physical and occupational therapists should be able to see improvements in cognitive processing for a patient that has began medication…” should be begun. 

·     In the sentence “Another advantage to medication treatment of ADHA, is that there is no…” remove comma after ADHA.  Also, “AHDA” is probably a typo and should likely read “ADHD”

·     In the sentence that reads “….treatment that may be required with other treatments that may require manual, hands on, application” the use of the world “treatment”and “required” are used redundantly, and may better read something like “…with other interventions that may utilize manual.  Additionally, hands on requires a hyphen (hands-on).

Disadvantages for Practitioners 

·     In the sentence that read “As practitioners, the disadvantages to using medication treatment…” to should be replaced with “of”

·     In the sentence “There has been reports of slight…” replace has with have

Positive Effects of Treatment

·     Remove comma after name within all citations of (Kaiser, et al., 2015) and (Shahidullah, et al., 2018)

Negative Effects (Side Effects)

·     Remove comma after name in all citations (Aguirre Castendeda, et al., 2016), (Emilsson, et al., 2017) and (Shaw, et al., 2012)

·     The sentence “See the video to left for more information” should read “…video to the left…”  Also, it may be a result of formatting, but when I view this section on my computer screen, the video does not appear on the indicated left hand side.  

Thank you for discussing such an important topic ladies.  Keep up the good work.  - Heather